(NOTE: I consider myself a good writer, but good only gets better by practice. So I’ve signed up for the WordPress Everyday Inspiration schedule to prompt me to write something different every day. This is the result of a recent nudge.)
Dear Ms. Landry,
We have received your letter of the 17th and have to say I’m a bit shocked. While alligators were not listed part of our delivery service, there are plentiful disclaimers that cover the contents of our “AnimalBox’ weekly animal delivery service. As you know, each month one of those deliveries is a special surprise amphibian and this month the team selected alligators. The care and feeding of the animal is explicitly stated to be your responsibility, though we do provide guidelines on our website. While we feel for your loss, we are not bound to provide compensation for your late cat. As for how you’re expected to create a body of water of suitable size for the alligator to habitat inside your studio apartment, we suggest you figure that out yourself. Should you wish to return the alligator, please know that you have already used both of your yearly return allotments with the kangaroo we sent you in January and the rabid guinea pig that was sent to you in April so you need to pay all associated shipping fees and insurance.
AnimalBox Customer Care