Stock Photo Guy has shown up in a couple recent blog posts I’ve seen, so here’s the latest scenarios I’m imagining he’s engaged in based on the content of the posts.

43 Productivity Quotes that Will Inspire You to Get Things Done

Here I like to think he’s struggling with which of the thousands of productivity tips that are shared each day – many of which contradict each other – to follow in order to make sure he’s getting everything done in a day.

How to Work on the Important When You’re Too Busy Putting out Fires

The headline would seem to indicate that here he’s meant to be fixing all the problems caused by people who aren’t as smart or talented as himself. Instead, I’m going to imagine he’s finally arrived at a solution to a problem he himself created that was significantly more obvious than he thought it would be and is extremely frustrated that he wasted a bunch of time on less productive approaches.

Unblock writers block with these hacks

The implication of what he’s doing here is pretty clear in the title. Instead I’m going to imagine he’s holding his head in exasperation over how the word “hack” has been appropriated beyond its initial tech meaning and is now applied to any sort of productivity tip.

Does my startup need DesignOps?

Here he’s trying to not snap at the infuriating appearance of yet another vague headline that offers zero value proposition to the audience but is instead simply optimized for search.

Why Your Instagram Account Isn’t Growing (and Why It’s Not Because of the Latest Instagram Algorithm Change)

Here he’s looking at Instagram and thinking the answer to the question posed in the headline is “No, it’s because you ditched all your friends to go become an ‘influencer’ in Palm Beach, Karen!”.

The three words that changed my life

Here he’s considering for the umpteenth time that day how there are never really just three words that can change your whole life or anything like that and the people who claim such are ignoring all the thousands of other little factors that went into any big change.

The only W no-one wants to take

Here he’s considering how “writer’s block” is really just a simple shorthand for a momentary lack of inspiration that will soon pass so everyone needs to chill out.

Chris Thilk is a freelance writer and content strategist who lives in the Chicago suburbs.

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