A semi-regular feature wherein I glance skeptically at select headlines from various writing advice blogs because I’m mean but without linking to them because I also don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Look, it’s complicated, let’s just move on.

Why (Not How) I Wrote 50,000 Words in March – I just assume the answer here is “because otherwise the voices in your head won’t be quiet so you give them what you want.” Either that or “because writers are inherently not fit for society so it’s not like I was going out anyway.”

What I’ve Learnt By Writing 150 Blog Posts – Interesting. How does this compare to when I passed this mark in early 2005 when there were like two blog platforms? Also, these were all personal posts, so can we have another conversation when half your monthly output is as a ghostwriter for clients?

Write When Nobody is Watching – Uhh yeah. I’d be super weirded out if someone were watching me write. Seriously, writing – especially if it’s creative writing of any sort – is a solitary activity. This ain’t tennis. If someone is watching me write for more than a few minutes before becoming bored out of their mind there are bigger issues that need to be addressed.

My Love Hate Relationship With Writing – Every writer in history all the time. Love writing, hate needing to write. If you don’t at least occasionally hate this and question why you ever started down this road I’m not sure you can call yourself a writer.

I Didn’t Want to Write Today and That’s OK – Agree 100% there, buddy. Part of being a writer is not wanting to write sometimes.

What To Do When You Are Afraid To Write – This implies there are times where I’m not afraid to write, which is inaccurate.

Chris Thilk is a freelance writer and content strategist who lives in the Chicago suburbs.