QOTD: 5/15/12

Via Rex Huppke in today’s Chicago Tribune:

All you have to remember is that if you’re traveling from the North Side of Chicago to the South Side, your quickest route will be to drive north to Milwaukee, take a ferry across the lake to Muskegon, Mich., then drive south to Indiana, hang a right, and before you know it, you’re in Hyde Park.

If you’re traveling into the city from the west suburbs, simply drive west to Des Moines, Iowa, catch a flight to Detroit, rent a car and drive to St. Joseph, Mich., rent a boat and then head straight for Navy Pier, keeping an eye out for any military jets that might try to shoot you out of the water. (Security will be a titch tight.)